MemberFebruary 13, 2020 at 6:11 am
The realchaw “Liberalism Manifest” boat after being painted for the journey
Realchaw has hired a party boat to take him, his campaign team, and some Liberal Democrat members from Walton-On-Thames to Westminister. This journey will take 6 hours and slowly traverse the Thames through South West London. It is supposed to represent realchaw vowing to take the message of the people of South West London to parliament. The boat, renamed “Liberalism Manifest” is painted an obnoxious orange that would draw the attention of anyone on the riverbank.
As realchaw sets off from Walton-On-Thames in the middle of the afternoon.
Realchaw: Campaigning in South West London has been one of the most exciting and loveliest things I’ve ever done. Being selected as the Liberal Democrat candidate for South West London has led to an experience I’ll never forget. Even if you choose not to vote for me this election, I will still work incredibly hard to represent the interests of my children’s home. The Liberal Democrats are firmly rooted in solid education policies through helping teachers and pro-European schemes for this pro-European city, and we want to help you the best we can! Thank youuuu, Walton! Vote realchaw on Valentine’s Day, create a London worth loving. I hope I represent you the next time I see you in parliament.
Realchaw steps onto the party boat, and it sets off into the sunset
The party boat arrives in Kingston-on-Thames as the boat docks for some leg stretching and a quick bite.
Realchaw gives a speech outside of the Admiralty House, with his back to the river.
Realchaw: Kingston-On-Thames! The centre of South West London, a bustling town with an amazing river and kind, smart people. I’m here today outside the Admiral building, after bringing a naval force of my own. I must formally declare that I’m here to siege it down, and I’m expecting surrender any moment now.
Realchaw: I jest. Nonetheless, the location of the admiralty house here is an important historical location. The Thames is a river that is vitally important to the people of the UK, but especially us Londoners. It has been the centre of the world, and when this very building was open in 1788, it certainly was. While the UK may be slightly less relevant now, especially that we’re out of the EU, that does not mean we must lose our naval might on a global stage. We are firmly committed to supporting our nuclear deterrent through Trident, and upgrading it with new Dreadnought-class submarines. We’ll continue to meet NATO targets, and coordinate with the US-NATO to expand and continue our liberal internationalism. We’ll encourage the admission of anti-Kremlin countries, like Ukraine.
Realchaw and gang return to the boat, he shouts from the top deck as it takes off
Realchaw: Thank you, Kingston-Upon-Thames, it has been a real honour! Vote realchaw on Valentine’s Day, create a London worth loving.
The boat arrives in Twickenham for an early dinner, realchaw gives a speech on Eel Pie Island, outside the Twickenham Rowing Club
Realchaw: Hello Twickenham, I am very happy to be in your beautiful suburban town. I had an amazing dinner at your Barmy Arms pub, which I thank very much for their hospitality. While in the pub I had a chat with the owner, Aleksander Kowalski, who hails from Warsaw. He moved here after retirement just 6 years ago and was able to start this traditional British pub. Kowalski is a fine example of what we, in the Liberal Democrats, stand for. Not just for immigration and diversity, but small businesses and local communities. This is what our country is built on and what the future will be. Because of this, we want to work towards multilateral freedom of movement deal with every single nation in the world, and a freedom of movement deal with the European Union. Britain should be a hub where everyone feels welcome, and we want to make that happen. Thank you.
Realchaw shouts to the pier as the boat drifts away
Realchaw: A big thank you to Twickenham and to wider South West London, especially to the big crowd that came out to see us! Remember to vote realchaw tomorrow on Valentine’s Day, and create a London worth loving.
Realchaw docks at Battersea Park, and gives his penultimate speech, to the backdrop of the sun setting over the Thames.
Realchaw: Good day Lambeth! I started my campaign here, and it’s the last place I’ll visit before my destination, parliament. Lambeth is a beautifully open and diverse city, dare I say a bit too close to the centre of London. Nonetheless, the basis of much of our legal system is here and it’s an incredibly important part of the UK. It is this that I wanted to highlight in my speech in Lambeth. The Liberal Democrats believe in working even further to improve and liberalise our antiquated justice system that Blurple refused to budge on. All trials must be fair, and the special advocate system is fundamentally at odds with this. We will ensure that closed proceedings are restricted to the greatest possible degree. We understand troubled youths exist everywhere, but are particularly a problem in big cities. We do not believe youngsters deserve to be condemned to a life of crime and a cycle of poverty. Therefore, we will ensure that the age of criminal responsibility is increased to 14 years. We will seek to establish a special criminal status for youth offenders aged 14-21. These individuals merit a greater rehabilitative focus, and the status will allow this. Thank you, Lambeth! Remember to vote realchaw tomorrow on Valentine’s Day, and create a London worth loving.
Realchaw docks in Westminster at dusk and gives a speech on the grasses outside.
Realchaw: To the people of South West London, I have arrived in Westminster to deliver the message that the people of South West London want progressive change. I honestly believe electing the Liberal Democrats is in the best interest of not just only the people of South West London, but of the UK. We are the party of the future, and we must move forward together. If you choose not to support me, I will continue to work tirelessly in the best interests of our home, and I will campaign to be MP again in August. I love South West London, London, the UK, and the world. Vote for the Liberal Democrats for a positive change, and vote realchaw tomorrow on Valentine’s Day, create a London worth loving. Thank you all!