One of my part time jobs (I have three) is at a small local tutoring academy. We tutor kids who have trouble with school work. Two of my friends, “Amy” and “Emily” also work there. We were all hired the same week, because we were close friends with Emily, who’s brother currently lived with the owner of the business “James” (33M).
It’s not a very serious job. We have fun, we joke a lot, we use a very non-traditional hands on and exciting methods for teaching the kids but we are the #1 tutoring academy in a very large metropolitan city and many of our students have very wealthy parents, so we make pretty decent money with extremely lax hours.
Emily, Amy, and I also worked one of our other jobs together at a restaurant. Emily and Amy hated the torturing job, and I loved it. I soon quit the restaurant meanwhile they both still work there. Shortly after, Amy was fired for lack luster work ethic and Emily quit for family reasons. Another week later we lost two other employees and I became full time and James and I began running the whole academy together, just the two of us.
In that time we became really good friends and of course, became close. My friends could tell I was developing a crush and became worried, but I never acted on anything because he had a girlfriend at the time. He broke up with her, we started spending more time together outside of work, but when I asked if he could come to our New Year’s eve party they said no and told me they didn’t like him. I asked them why and they literally had not ONE single reason besides the fact he liked me while he had a girlfriend even though he broke up with her less than two weeks later.
James and I have not been physical. We haven’t kissed, hugged, held hands nothing. I went out of town for Christmas and needed someone to watch my dog— I asked both of them first and neither could so I left my dog with James and they are livid. I asked again why do they dislike him so much and they admitted it’s because of the age gap and how many girlfriends and sexual partners he’s had (6 girlfriends, two of them 3-5 year relationships and 50+ sexual partners) meanwhile I’m a virgin who’s only been in two serious relationships, both of which were only 2 years.
To add: I strongly dislike their boyfriends but I always play nice. Ones boyfriend punched a whole in a wall and literally stalked her when she tried to break up and the others boyfriend is quite literally a hardworking dumb ass bum who always needs to borrow money or have her save him.
Would I be wrong for contributing to date him regardless of how they feel? Is what they’re saying even a red flag at all?
TL;DR my best friends hate the guy I like and I’m at a loss for what to do.